Sexually Assaulted in a Christian home: A Victim Speaks

Trigger Warning: This post contains information about sexual assault and/or violence which may be triggering to survivors.

During the past week, the world was hit with the extremely disturbing news of child sexual abuse within a well-known Christian family. This horror has created no shortage of news articles, opinions, public statements, and blog posts from what seems to be the entire spectrum of humanity. Unfortunately, much has been written by professing Christians that clearly demonstrates the need for more understanding and education regarding the dynamics of sexual abuse and those who abuse.  However, I do believe that this difficult public dialogue may actually be raising a greater awareness to an issue that is all too often ignored or misunderstood within much of the Christian community. 

In my opinion, the most important voices to speak into this ongoing dialogue are those who have been victimized.   These heroes can teach all of us so much if we simply take the time to turn down our own voices so that we can truly listen to what they have to say.  

Jen Bicha is a good friend who is one of these amazing voices. She continues to teach me so much about this issue and about the heart of Jesus.   I encourage each of us to take a few minutes to turn off our voices, and listen to what this hero can teach us. Thank you, Jen. – Boz

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Last year I walked into a Florida courtroom prepared to testify about the memories that continued to haunt me. When I took the stand, the district attorney asked me what my relationship was to my offender. I hesitated before answering, “He is my brother.”

As I’ve watched the Duggar story unfold in recent days, I have been filled with a mix of emotions. Grief. Anger. Disbelief. Horror. As I saw debates rage back and forth about forgiveness, age, consent, hypocrisy, justice, and even Christianity itself, I wanted to scream that we are missing the point here. Who will be the voice of the five precious young women?

Can we take a moment and consider what it may have been like to grow up in a home where your older brother, your protector, is also your rapist? Imagine a world where monsters really do live under your bed, in your closet, and in the shower.

I will never forget the subtle ways my rapist began to groom me. My brother would be put in charge of watching my sisters and I when my parents would leave on errands. He would insist that he needed to watch us get our pajamas on as we prepared for bed. I was very capable of getting myself dressed without his assistance, but he threatened to tell our dad that I wasn’t obeying if I refused. I didn’t like what he was doing to me, but he was placed in a position of authority over me, so I felt I had no choice but to obey his demands. 

Click here for complete article:

http://boz.religionnews.com/2015/05/28/sexually-assaulted-in-a-christian-home-a-victim-speaks/

 

 

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